Mortal Musings Enthusiast Pillows

"I got those famous last words you wanted"

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

"No flash in the ancient mummy gallery."

Alaskan Cryogenic Society.

"Half Empty. Half Empty. Half Empty-"

'That's a bad omen no sooner does he invent the wheel than he has the first ever road traffic accident.'

Lancelot put to the Test.

Mummies for Dummies

'Reeta can tell your fortune from your bank statements.'

'I'm the one who sold King Tut his tomb. The commission was huge.'

That Pesky 'Why' Chromosome.

Leo Tolstoy

"Fountain of youth? No, I'm searching for a cure for natural causes."

It isn't just the media that's biased...often the voters are too.

Bertrand Russell

"Wow. That guy on psychic chat line is really good. He told me our next phone bill would be bigger than usual!"

'Definitely fake.'

Hippocrates

'You will meet a tall, handsome psychologist who will teat your gullibility.'

Astral Projecting Babushkas

"If only they knew we can still get texts up here."

"Dear, I've bounced back from cancer, two heart attacks and a stroke. You know what kills me?" "Obviously nothing."

The Last Powerpoint

HOw the Cat WOund Up With Nine Lives.

"Well, how do you think the interview went?"

A Palm reader reading her palm with the aid of a battery powered night light

Three balls...no waiting.

'Can I borrow a cuppa tealeaves,dearie?

"Hey! I knew I could depend on you two!"

"£80 for a crystal ball?? They must've seen you coming. . . !"

Fisherman takes home the mermaid he caught.

"I can't believe how young I look."

"Apparently, he was the most disapproving of all the Pharaohs."

'So, do you smoke?'