Morning Mugger Gifts

'It's a popular new flavor - It tastes like you're asleep!'

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

Back to work...

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

Full English Breakfast.

"I run around this high school track every morning."

'It's only 6 AM, but I want to send the kids to Wally's house before his mother sends him over here.'

The coffee's not working.

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

Broken Alarm Clock.

'Hey, wait for me!'

The Cat's Alarm Clock

'Anybody for breakfast?'

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

"If I adopt you, you're going to have to wake me up and walk me twice a day."

"How about a little more coffee?"

"I know it's tough to get motivated on Mondays, but..."

"It's another day, Phil. Planning to suit up?"

'Don't you love the clean, fresh smell of the morning air?'

The Daily Commute

'Misery is sleeping in late on Saturday morning then realizing it's only Wednesday...'

I am coffee and I need more coffee

'I want a big breakfast.. there are a lot of contended female cats in the neighborhood this morning.'

Runner's High, Runner's Low

'Vitamins A, B, C, D...Hey, Mom! - this cereal has all the recommended daily allowance of alphabet in it!'

'This may be the only time I'll ever bring you breakfast in bed - So wake up!'

"I much prefer the evening milking to the morning one: The farmer is not a "morning person", now is he?"

Nothing like that first cup of coffee, eh, Frank?

Munch Master.

'Gravity wins - again.'

'Bonny, I've forgotten...What time is that 9 o'clock meeting tomorrow?...'

I'm going to hate myself in the morning, but I hate everything in the morning.

"The planet is all wobbly this morning."