Morning Mugger T-Shirts

'It's a popular new flavor - It tastes like you're asleep!'

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

Back to work...

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

Full English Breakfast.

'Hey, wait for me!'

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

'It's only 6 AM, but I want to send the kids to Wally's house before his mother sends him over here.'

"I run around this high school track every morning."

The coffee's not working.

Broken Alarm Clock.

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

"How about a little more coffee?"

You have the worst spring breath.

"If I adopt you, you're going to have to wake me up and walk me twice a day."

The Cat's Alarm Clock

'Anybody for breakfast?'

"I know it's tough to get motivated on Mondays, but..."

"It's another day, Phil. Planning to suit up?"

'Don't you love the clean, fresh smell of the morning air?'

The Daily Commute

'Misery is sleeping in late on Saturday morning then realizing it's only Wednesday...'

I am coffee and I need more coffee

'I want a big breakfast.. there are a lot of contended female cats in the neighborhood this morning.'

Runner's High, Runner's Low

'This may be the only time I'll ever bring you breakfast in bed - So wake up!'

"I much prefer the evening milking to the morning one: The farmer is not a "morning person", now is he?"

Buzz. Go away. Buzz buzz. I'm up! The alarm clock always wants it more than you do.

Nothing like that first cup of coffee, eh, Frank?

'Vitamins A, B, C, D...Hey, Mom! - this cereal has all the recommended daily allowance of alphabet in it!'

Munch Master.

'Bonny, I've forgotten...What time is that 9 o'clock meeting tomorrow?...'

'Gravity wins - again.'

'If you get one who refuses to wake up, pour it in his lap.'