Morning Humor Devourer Gifts

'I said - you don't want to read YOUR stars this morning, Fred!'

A man and his baby are wearing bibs with images of what they are eating.

The Daily Commute

'How do you feel when you get up in the morning?' 'Amazed!'

'Household water use'

Nothing like that first cup of coffee, eh, Frank?

'He isn't use to getting up this early.'

the Morning Joe team.

"Dang it."

'Are you still eating your breakfast? I want to lay the table for lunch.'

'What time is it? The small hand is on the 6 and the cat's paw is on my chin.'

'Hey Dad - you're shaving with my transistor radio!'

'Oh yeah? Try to sleep in when your dad is a rooster!'

Typical Monday

'Why, first thing on Monday mornings, do I always get someone who can't enunciate very well?'

'Cock-a-doodle... don't.'

"Ladies ladies, please. There's enough of me to go around."

"How about a quick espresso before school, Toby?"

"I get it- the old caffeinated-cop, decaffeinated-cop routine."

Clocks. Why do you want two alarm clocks? Getting up is bad news and I want a second opinion.

Listen, Mom - someone in there must be ticklish!

Toast with tanlines

'Okay, Bancroft - here we go again.'

'And this one is for first thing in the morning.'

Voice on the webcam to man's dog - You're looking a bit rough this morning, John.

The Mid Morning Bird

"I made breakfast last spring."

'Well, Mr. Grumpy, who got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning?'

What, you've never seen coffee with a worm in it? The Too-Early Bird.

"I hate Daylight Saving Time."

Morning Vacuum

'It's for breakfast viewers.'

'He's trying to figure out how to install a snooze alarm.'

'My wife finally got up early enough to fix me a hot breakfast.'

'I prefer flakes.' 'Figures.'