Moo-ving Baseball Fan Gifts

'Are you sure this is part of the Yankee farm system?'

"Lordy, I am such a klutz!"

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.

Vendor selling testosterone.

'Clear out your desk, Randy. ...NEXT!'

'The only thing exciting about these games is our dads fighting with the umpire.'

Monster Baseball

"Got him up at the stadium, Chief. It was Yankee Duck Day."

I watched an erotic thriller last night. Have you heard of the film 'Field of Dreams'?

All Star Team.

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

'Don't get up. ... I've got it!'

'He's not a skilled pitcher. In fact, he throws like a nerd...'

'Yo, Corona! Pack your stuff! You've been traded.'

'Watch out, Dewey! Cow pie!'

'Time out! He needs a hug!!'

'The nurse wanted you to pee in THIS type of cup.'

Psychiatrist to man dressed in baseball jersey: 'You've never gotten over the fact your father wouldn't play catch with you?'

'Well, there's another strikeout. ... get that bat company on the phone. I'm having second thoughts about their so-called 'volume discount.''

What would happen if Shakespeare lived centuries later and tried being a baseball umpire? Out, damned spot! Out, I say! Can you explain the infield fly rule. It is madness yet there is method in it! What's in a name? A rose by any other name would hit as sweet! Fair is foul, and foul is fair. You should stick to writing.

A Cat about to smash into a Goldfish Aquarium for a meal.

Waiting for the end of the acid-rain delay at the ballpark in the year 2258...

"A game similar to baseball was first played in the Olympics in 1996." I didn't think "Jeapardy!" had any softball questions.

"Yin and Yankee fan"

Adding people with a background in music has made the team better. The new hitting coach is just like clarinet player Benny Goodman. Benny Goodman was "The King of Swing"! Nobody is better with that instrument than this guy. That's why he's playing first bass! The rock star with bat cleanup for the team. He'll have some big hits this year! And the opera singer will be the new ace on the mound. Thanks to the perfect pitch!

'Me? Argue? ...No, sir! That was an excellent call.'

Ahhh, spring baseball.

"I can't shake the feeling there's always someone looking over my shoulder."

'Remember that summer we coached little league?'

Arcade Game Baseball.

Sports Medicine.

"It's her first bench-clearing brawl."

"Hey! What's with the 'home run trot'? You struck out!"

As smart as he was, Albert Einstein could not figure out how to handle those tricky bounces at third base.