Monument Maverick T-Shirts

Flossing Mount Rushmore.

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

Video Henge: made from melting and molding 3,000,000 obsolete VCR tapes.

'First of all, relax.'

'I love the mountains and all, but I simply can't do this....I'm just too chicken.'

"I can see you're a ski newbie."

Rogue elephant

Redecorating Easter Island.

"What makes you question our motives for coming here?"

"Nice design but you haven't quite mastered the technology!"

Easter Island Tours. Theories differ. Ernie believes they were used to display a selection of giant wigs.

Ski kicker.

Helicopter tour guide: 'And THERE they are folks! The mysterious ancient stone figures of Easter Island!'

"Well, I guess this rock sample pretty much clears up any lingering doubts about life on Mars!"

'It's just a calendar, who cares what it looks like?'

A weather vane on top of an artist's studio points in directions that include: "pop", "abstract", "figurative" and "post-painterly".

Lady Liberty's Self-Care

I cannot tell you why men will not ask for directions

"Would our big tacky objects look good here?"

"I love it....but lose the bodies"

"They ruin the landscape!"

'Note his bold brush strokes, Fred...'

'Needs some underarm protection!!'

"I owe it all to my pacemaker."

'Goopta took early retirement.'

A monument gets down from his plinth.

"Norman, let's lend out the Olmec head."

"Sorry, but that's a road racing bike. I'm a mountain bike specialist."

Executive Order: Add Trump's image to Mt. Rushmore!

I hate getting ready for Y1K.

'Now do you believe me about every other driver on the road.'

'He's not hurt. He's just really, really cold.'

"First you forget the flag! Now you tell me you don't know how to yodel!"

'Sorry I'm late. I had you booked as the gastroenteritis, on Mont Blanc.'

Expectations vs. Bitterness