Mongol Empire Fan Pillows

Genghis Khan

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

Hadrian's Wall

The Fall of Gnome

"Makes me wish I'd kept that gorilla suit."

Cat king.

"Well thank you, and may I say you look quite handsome too..."

Elizabeth II

The great slingshot of Mongolia.

'Actually, I find the destroying more satisfying than the nation-building.'

The de-friending of Julius Caesar

'What Caesar doesn't understand is that all politics is local!'

Elizabeth I

'You can read, right? -- I want you to check this thing for loopholes.'

Britain in 410AD

'Make up your mind. Do you want to be rescued or not?'

Hadrian's Fence

"I graduated magma cum laude."

'Okay, let me see your hands, your feet, and that wily prehensile tail...'

"No! I get the zombie. The little guy gets the banana daiquiri. Slim, here, gets the Presbyterian!"

Rome Budget Office. Nero is cutting the fire department budget to pay for his violin lessons.

A cleaner in a cinema

'They're finally taking me seriously.'

Roman

'Jumping over the moon party at Freddy's tonight.'

Christian lions

'Then, after adding the eye of newt, allow to simmer for twenty f*****g minutes.'

MONOTONY

'Not that we don't appreciate the popcorn, but how about something low-carb next time?'

King Kong goes nine-to-five.

'I take it then that levelling the Balkans first is not an option?'

'Well in two years time, I might just not vote for you to be emperor again.'

Second Coalition Attempting to Push the French out of Italy

'Dad, I wanted my toast lightly browned, not burnt!'

"You don't have alzheimer's. No one can remember who's who on Game of Thrones."