Monastery Storyteller Gifts

Brother Kevin is wrecking the dorm!

"We only got six days of funding."

"Eat my dust!"

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

'Look, I never said salvation would be PRETTY!'

Phoenix

Santa CGI Effect

"I am wearing sunglasses and using sunscreen with 50% UV protection. What could possibly go wrong?"

Atlas carrying Earth about to slip on banana peel.

'Today's sermon is on Eve and Adam....'

Employees must cleanse souls before returning to work.

'Go right on in, Helen. By the way, be sure to read tomorrow's newspaper - I understand your grandson has drawn a cartoon in your honor.'

What happens on Noah's Ark stays on Noah's Ark.

'From creating stuff like this you make a LIVING?'

'Since you're a teacher, we picked this one from the Tree of Knowledge.'

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

"Since both of us believe in reincarnation, what if I pay you all the money I owe you in the next life?"

Alternative Big Bang Theory.

'He was brought by the stork.'

'How nice! -- They're making a ten-part miniseries about the Bible!'

"Relax, I grade on the curve."

'It's a special delivery from 'Troys are us'.'

"I'm a pastor. My job is to speak 20 minutes on Sunday and listen the rest of the week."

'...Noah really knows how to build an Ark.'

Vicar's wife to vicar - "And if you can't be good, be careful!"

'Take no notice, he was raided by wolves.'

"Hmmm...says here that you were in charge of your church's Puppet Ministry."

"In my first creation I made man introspective, peaceful and considerate. It was sooo boring."

"This must be the pony daddy ordered for his little princess."

Atlas juggling with the moon.

Before you learn to make the perfect ale, my son, you must first learn to make the perfect little bowl of nuts and pretzels.

Janus.

"This should be interesting...."

"Remember now, this is for your Birthday AND for Christmas!"

'Sadly the William Tell legend did claim one small victim'