Storyteller Of Sacred Tales Gifts

'Today's sermon is on Eve and Adam....'

"We only got six days of funding."

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

"It's cool – God told us to!"

"Eat my dust!"

Teaching a Sunday school class didn't end the way John imagined.

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

'Look, I never said salvation would be PRETTY!'

"Still, you've got to admit our being swallowed by a fish has its humorous aspects!"

Phoenix

Santa CGI Effect

'This whole Noah's Ark business sounds like a quota system to me!'

Frontispiece to 'The Pickwick Papers'

"Tell me the story about Jonah and the big fish again, Dad."

"Will she know what this is in reference to?"

Atlas carrying Earth about to slip on banana peel.

"I am wearing sunglasses and using sunscreen with 50% UV protection. What could possibly go wrong?"

Moses comes to Los Angeles.

'Dad. I have a stow-a-way to report!'

'Since you're a teacher, we picked this one from the Tree of Knowledge.'

"Huh, Pharaoh let them go after the tenth plague. And here I was all set to send a coronavirus! Guess I'll just have to save it for later."

"Stay back from the edge. Remember what happened to the last angel that fell.

'Go right on in, Helen. By the way, be sure to read tomorrow's newspaper - I understand your grandson has drawn a cartoon in your honor.'

What happens on Noah's Ark stays on Noah's Ark.

School nativity. Boy says: 'If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this drama ...'

'From creating stuff like this you make a LIVING?'

'You should have thought about your allergies before you built the ark.'

"King Herod sent us."

"Sorry, this is in Hebrew, and I only read Hieroglyphics!"

''Adam and Eve'? -- then You're going ahead with the dualism idea?'

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

'...And remember, tune in next week at this same time for the exciting conclusion of 'David and Bathsheba.'!'

"Repeat after me... We are vegan... We are vegan..."