Momster Gifts

I told the school I definitely didn't want my son to be labelled - but if he had to be labelled, 'gifted and talented' would be nice!

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

"A whack, whack here. A whack, whack there. Here a whack, there a whack. Everywhere a whack, whack."

'It's no problem, Mom. Samantha just likes to check on my table manners.'

'...and remember, son, never throw up on an old carpet...wait until they get a new one!'

Mobsters at the Beach

'Mark Antony addreses the mob'

Mafia Family Life: 'I'm sorry dear - but I had to bring some work home!'

'I made a Valentine's Day card for you. The school has no art supplies so I wrote the color in.'

Notorious gangsters, Bunny and Clyde.

'This is a personal insult to me and my family. Paulie, word is you regifted that horse's head I gave you last month. . .'

Gangsta wrap.

'Every time you lose an argument, you put a horse's head on my side of the bed!'

"Daddy, can I have a pony killed?"

"Right kids, there's no camp and no vacation, but Mommy and I are super excited to make this summer our best ever!"

The Clown Hit

"Did you remember to whack the cat?"

'Shall I be Motherhood?'

'I want you to 'take him for a walk.''

'Lewis and Cabrini.'

'Did you get the hit man Frankie?'

Mobster Dogs Burying Bones

"Don't worry, boss, he ain't gonna be takin' his shoes off on an airplane no more."

Parachuting with Concrete Shoes

'You've not been involved with money laundering before have you Joe!'

Jonathan Bugsy Seagull

'Relax... When I said, your husband's swimming with the fishes. I merely meant that he's gone SCUBA diving with the boss.'

"Of course I got rid of him...in my own way."

"Mom's left her phone here. We'll have to walk to the kitchen to tell her to get us dinner."

"Whack him. And if you can't whack him, redact him."

"Who, Big Sal? Sure, we were in cahoots years ago, but we fell out of cahoots."