Modern Society Pillows

Museum Displays a Brain as a Critical Thinking Machine.

The Evolution Of Man.

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

'Well, I'm not telling him off. He might be armed.'

Then & Now

Hermit on island can't escape modern society.

'Apart from that,how do you like married life?'

"I grew up in a traditional family. My parents divorced when I was six years old."

In Case Of Fire, Pray! . . . In Case of Prayer, Fire!

'She's my only student whose parents are married, and they're gay.'

Social Stigma

Freak Show

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

"Scherer Chevrolet never forgets my birthday."

"You be the moral grandstander and I'll be the politically incorrect troll."

"You have such a familiar face. Who did it?"

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"Gee, thanks pal."

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

"Who's taking my order—the committee of the whole, or is there a liaison for decaf?"

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

Crap from the future.

'I'll have the bacon and hay wrap.'

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

"Here's something called "The Fifty Greatest Countdown Shows Ever!""

Weird things I do because of the internet

'Due to government surveillance, is my allowance taxable?'

Wasting away again in Cappuccinoville.

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

Dawing your Cellphone

Selfie Stick

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

"Biff's old money, Angelo is new money and Boris is funny money."

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.