Modern Romance Explorer Pillows

'Brad and I met online, webcast our wedding, took a virtual honeymoon...and now we're divorcing through an online attorney.'

"I broke up with him because he wouldn't let me use 'Leonardswifi' only 'Leonardswifi-Guest'."

"Look, all we did was sleep together. I saved watching 'Game of Thrones' for us."

"Not tonight, dear. I'm sexting."

"No Justin. I'm saving myself for college."

"The way you look at me, Craig... you really see me."

"I love you very much, but apparently it's break-up season."

'Fish with benefits.'

Male Pattern Badness: 'You're telling me you've got a wife and kids?'

'No, but she said I could have all the virtual dates I want for $9.95 a month.'

"I'm afraid you will have to sign a non-disclosure agreement."

"I'll ALWAYS love you Roger, I'll just be having sex with someone else."

"I'm afraid swiping left doesn't work in here."

Online Dating

Cosmonaut

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

'Hon, I'm home!'

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

"This is fun. I'm usually kind of a loner."

"Well, who's stupid idea was it to honeymoon on Moonlight bay?!"

'My life coach traded me.'

Astronaut love

"On your left."

The Loving Couple

Goldilocks and the three boyfriends.

"What is it about a tee shirt cannon that says 'foreplay' to you?"

'He had bulging muscles and a wallet to match!'

"Do you...enter name...take...enter name...to be your...choose one from the pull down menu...click the I do icon now please."

Tasty.

"What I mean is what do you do with yourself all day?"

"Morning, Brad." "Morning, Angelina."

Love and temptation go hand in hand...

Mate Mart

'Do you have anything cheap but guaranteed to help me get laid?'

'Relax babe, that's me before the operation,'