Modern Medicine Admirer Gifts

"Of course, this will require extensive plastic surgery!"

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

"What's that mark on your arm, Mama?"

'There they go - off on their own - and a finer bunch of fledgelings one couldn't ask.'

'I used to think I was the only one kids hated... I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for you guys.'

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

London GPs could become an endangered species.

"Your test results are in...now the interpretations can begin."

"I'll be fielding any questions you may have and my assistant, Carol, will be googling the answer."

"The doctor was more lucid today! That's a good sign!"

'We're playing doctor ??" Billy's the anesthetist.'

'You're suffering from job-stress insomnia. Stop counting sheep to fall asleep.'

"Fruity nose, hints of wild cherry, soothing on the palate, goes well with cough and cold."

Current location

"Thanks to modern medicine, we now have drugs to make any season the season to be jolly."

PHARMACY, 'Tell Hippocrates to write his prescriptions in Greek -- I can't read Babylonian!'

"I'm sorry, but the doctor no longer sees patients in person. But he does take e-mail from 9 to 3."

'If you begin to feel unwell, start or stop taking aspirin...'

'Do you want the pill, the suppository, the patch, or the app?'

'I have no idea what's wrong with you. I just collect information. My computer makes the decisions.'

'Take two tokes of weed, Mrs Grunfield, and call me in the morning.'

"The good news is, with gene therapy, it's now possible to grow back legs."

'Excuse me, Professor Hippocrates...but when do we learn how to hit out of bunkers?'

Anatomy.

Too much Inflammation

"Uh-Oh!"

"Take 4 teaspoons of this medicine every day. . ."

"I have to tell you, I got a totally different diagnosis from someone named PookyPoo on medi-answer.com."

'We've not met, but I'm your keyhole surgeon.'

"Milton finally found a doctor he can trust - one who still believes in the healing power of money."

"As a confirmed hypochondriac, I rely on placebos to get me through the day."

'Take two a day and in a couple of years you'll be a pharmacist!'

"I hear they can freeze you until they discover a cure."

'First Rogaine, now Viagra'

'You'll be fine. Take two aspirin and call, fax, text or email me in the morning.'