Modern Human Pillows

"He's standing upright and using a mobile phone. I think our evolution has begun."

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

'I guess mother and baby are doing fine. She's already sending out selfies.'

"Who's taking my order—the committee of the whole, or is there a liaison for decaf?"

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

Crap from the future.

Audio Books

"If I 'HAD IT ALL' it would it be enough?"

Weird things I do because of the internet

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

Snoopy with Laptop

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

"Aah! Bless! Look at him on his I-pad!"

"You be the moral grandstander and I'll be the politically incorrect troll."

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

Updated Classis: Alice Through the You Tube.

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

"We realize that kids start using technology at a younger age these days, so our strollers come with Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and GPS."

"Here's something called "The Fifty Greatest Countdown Shows Ever!""

"Did you get my tweet?"

"He just said his first word!"

"Will follow you on social media for food."

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

'Hurray for indoor plumbing!'

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

The Evolution Of Man.

"Freshly ground pepper?"

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

"You haven't enjoyed the Yule log till you've enjoyed it in high def."