Modern Fable Lover Gifts

Updated Fables. The Ant And The Grasshopper … And The Mosquito. IRS.

'This has all the makings of a fable. But first lets take lots of tests.'

'This wasn't quite the fairytale ending that Colin had anticipated...'

"Why is there so much emphasis put on our stupid race?" "I think people are more interested in it as a metaphor than as an actual race." "Slow and steady wins the race, that sort of thing." "That would explain why I always lose..." "Bartender, another please." "Maybe you should slow down." "You never learn do you?"

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

"Go ahead. This one seems too arrogant."

Mouse is doctor to lions with thorns in paws.

"Sorry, dear... I don't have a pumpkin spiced flat white chai latte. I just have this one..."

'Yes Mr Hare, you were right: He IS on steroids!'

"She married and then divorced, and then she married and divorced, and then she married and lived happily ever after."

'I'm going to have to cut it - Daddy is complaining about the shampoo bill again.'

"Grandmother, what big diastolic numbers you have."

Accountant Bedtime Stories

"Never mind the porridge, someone's stolen my woodland mushroom collection."

Crow and fox

7 More Dwarfs

Tortoise and hare on treadmills.

"Well, I assume the three bears went in the woods like all bears do. May I continue?"

Snow White and her Seven people.

"Grandpa, tell us again about pensions!"

'I'll place the bets. You just be sure to hit the hare with the tranquilizer.'

"The third little pig built a super strong brick house so The Big Bad Wolf couldn't break in and violate the rules of social distancing."

'...Oh yeah? Well I've never heard of the 'denture fairy'.'

'Please, Grandpa Turkey! Tell us about the Christmas massacre and the Thanksgiving bloodbath!'

'Is "I'll huff and I'll puff till I blow your castle down" the best intimidation we can come up with!!'

"Your grandma and I have decided to live together."

'If you're out and about today don't forget the pith helmet.'

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

Folk o' the Wee

'Hey! No Tongues!'

"Wow. . . Are you expecting or did you nibble on your gingerbread house again?"

Fairy godmother arrives

"After the big race, the tortoise and the hare are ordered to provide urine samples."

Hare tells tortoise: 'Remembe the plan: on the final stretch, you go down.'

"Nothing is ever in my size either."