Modern Elder Gifts

Elderly and artificial intelligence

'Dewey! Grandpa's stuck again. Give him a couple of whacks upside the head.'

'You seem quieter tonight. Did they give you something to help you relax?'

"I often consult with a higher authority... my grandmother."

"Forget the palm dearie...I'll read yer race."

'You may disagree with me now, Son, but when you're 500 years old, you'll understand.'

Rock on Grandma!

Old men,"I have terrible trouble with my joints..the cannabis keeps falling out."

'There is a fancy name for your condition...Let's just call it 86 and counting.'

Grandad Prodigy

Remembering His Marbles

'Oh, to be 75 again!'

'It will save us time if you don't tell me what still works and and what doesn't hurt.'

'Mr. Franklin. What did I tell you about wheelies in the hallway?'

"Meanwhile, in the Memory Care Unit... I said, your secret’s safe with me."

Computer Jobs

Medical Bling: "Help!" on a rope, Important info, O2 4U, Snazzy 3-prong

The walking frame for the mobile immobile.

To protest the lousy food at the nursing home, the guys, just like back in the day, staged a 'sit-in'. Unfortunately, nobody noticed.

Ageing Population

"Relax, at your age it's perfectly natural to make groaning noises every time you move a body part."

"At our age I figure we only have two taste buds left. One for vodka and one for wine."

"Are we aging in place?"

Helen's husband is an old grump, too.

"Look at that adorable mother and baby! I haven't changed a diaper in years."

"Don't bother complaining about anything to granddad...he'll just say 'these are the best days of your life!!!'"

Low Tide

"Oh yes, I used to love chasing balls, but now, I'm just content watching you young ones doing it..."

Boomer Emojis