Modern Diner Enthusiast Gifts

"We take cash, credit, or you can watch our ad 92 times."

Diner.

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

'Who gets the decaf?'

'The food is great, but it's embarrassing the way she always insists on burping you.'

"The after-dinner mint is the boss's idea. I think it's superfluous."

"The Halloween Special is the pork and kraut. It'll come back and haunt you."

'If you order...You can digest it in...'

"Eggshell in omelette make Hulk angry!"

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

'One placebo or two, doctor?'

Choice hellhole

"And finally the chef's surprise - the check!"

'Gasview Hotel' - 'Dinerview Gas' - 'Motelview Diner' - 'Hiwayview Suites'

'Flipping pancakes.' 'Waiting with a net.'

'Cook is a musician. Improvises. Never makes the same thing twice.'

"The usual."

"I'll have the prayer breakfast."

"Fresh pepper?"

Couple sharing the plastic widget from a pizza box like a chicken's wish bone

"Sorry Sir, but what exactly were you expecting to be served when you ordered the 'early bird special'."

"Welcome to the Short Staffed Cafe serving food like your grandma cooked. Is your grandma busy? We really need a cook."

'Know something? Love IS wonderful!'