Mobile Home Humorist Gifts

'But this IS my mobile home!'

'It's my mobile home.'

"Which carries a more favorable interest rate, an auto loan or a home improvement loan? My mobile home needs a new transmission."

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

Bob's Driving School.

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

The wooden clothes horse of Troy.

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

Yard Sale

'Oh, Olivia, I just love your new caption! Where on earth did you find it?'

"Since you had so much fun with the Home Equity Loan I gave you, this year's stocking will be filled with a shiny new Notice of Foreclosure."

"Actually, 'Loss of Limb' would be covered under your homeowners policy."

"Mom, Dad, this is Kevin, our new ombudsman."

"Scientists have extended the life of the fruit fly."

'Beware you don't trip over him!'

'It's a Volksvegan...it runs on vegetable oil!'

A Semicolon.

Attack of the 65 - Inch Woman

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

'Beware of SUV.'

Carpet Cows

'Classic literature for D.I.Y. haters'

"Our cat is the only god this home needs."

'She let the bedbugs bite.'

'We've found the problem...'

Speed Bumps.

'The fire seems to be drawing well.'

'Ain't it great, Wally, to be over the hill and not under it!'

'You may be the CEO of a large corporation, but at home you're an OMW, observe my whims!'

Need something from the fridge? This looks like a job for...Indoorman!

'Be sure to bring home your divots so you can patch the bare spots in our lawn.'

'Goodnight honey... did you remember to unplug the baby?'