Mobile Communication Pillows

'How's it going, Rachel?'

"Of course the texting does tend to work better with the younger generation..." "Gnudh,nxt twl?"

"Are you busy or are you at work?"

When it comes to texting, she's all thumbs.'

Marathon Runners all on the phone.

"Is it an important text?"

"Relax, that was no explosion! My daughter texting at the speed of sound caused a sonic boom."

"I love my new texting app, it automatically selects peoples preferred pronouns."

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"My email is down... talk to me."

Lynching on social media

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

'The check is in the email attachment.'

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

Polly txt speak

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

'How fast can you hype?'

"Greetings, I'm the bluebird of dank memes."

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

Campaign for Plain English

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

21st century water cooler conversations.

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'