Misunderstood Golf Legends Gifts

'I said we were going to play a game of skins, not shirts and skins!'

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

Dummies Books.

"You're way too strong Dad: You've overshot the green by about two hundred metres..."

Golfers forming the raising the flag on Iwo Jima.

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

Red Indian carrying a baby in golf bag.

"I hate golf. There's something unnatural about a game where the lowest score wins."

Golf Crime Scene.

"I lost count back there after your fifth stroke. How many did it take?"

Golfer on Ski Lift.

"Forget that ball caddie, there's another just like it up here that I can tap in...."

The game requires no great physical strength...

'Lunge out of the water and slap his face!? ... Oh, that's real effective, Leonard.'

Golfer and the Eagle

Golfing Fakir.

"In a blinding flash, Norman suddenly realises the mind-numbing boredom and utter futility of the sport that is called golf..."

Books. Ernest Hemingway Festival. Did you read Hemingway's book "Across the River and Into the Trees"? No. I didn't even know he played golf.

'Remember 'be the ball'.' 'I am the ball. But apparently, I'm a devious, misguided, malevolent ball.'

'Use the four wood!'

Man pelted with golf balls.

'You've heard of Tiger, Bear and Shark...... meet the snail!'

'I like to think of myself as Tiger Woods' greatest nightmare - although I'd don't know why he'd ever dream about me.'

'I've been retired a month and I already hate the game.'

"I'm currently ranked 104,387,519th in the world."

Big bird atop 18th hole flag on golf course.

"In this tournament we have created a different level of difficulty."

Lady of the lake holding a golf ball.

101 uses of a dead cat: golf cart.

"I feel like we have so much in common!"

"I'll comeback to rescue you after I find my ball."

Gary Player

Slight breeze from the south