Mission Planner Gifts

'Wow! A big cardboard box!' - 'Target sighted! Engage 'stealth mode'' - 'Your dinner's ready.'

"We only got six days of funding."

"I suppose just climbing the greasy pole is no longer an option..."

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

When Engineers Crack.

"The anger management consultant said he wasn't going to alter his **** dates at this t****stage which fits in with the 'managing change' consultant who said it was to late to change her plans..."

'We took the old plan, folded in half, and now it's the new plan.'

"I think you might need to start again."

Innovation & Calculation

I don't think we can survive here. There's little chance we can afford the taxes.

A cat is hiding in a block of cheese to lure a mouse out of its hole.

"Compare Calculate Contrast Before you make a move"

'We had no contingency plan for things going right.'

God's Sticky Notes

"We must kill this initiative, so let's mainstream it."

Engineer on the move.

"Okay, haha, very funny, you guys. Now toss down the ladder."

"That's it - I've had it up to here with measurement devices."

'I've worked out that all you need for a summer blockbuster is...'

"We're still trying to sort out the details."

Bad Office Planning

"What are we doing wrong?"

Father Time Management

Clear construction agreements are important.

"I thought an illogical framework would work better."

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

Car insurance, breakdown cover, mobile insurance, home insurance, camera insurance... - 'Life insurance, health insurance, professional indemnity, and tax insurance.' - 'Let the bad times roll... heh, heh!'

"Do I look like I need rescuing?"

'No fax paper? Ok, you'll have to ride for help.'

The other day during the zombie apocalypse

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

"Of course nobody can make head nor tale of it, but the good news is that it's been nominated for the Turner prize next year."

'Steve, I admire your determination to make this plan work.'

'Company planning department'

Office of Strategic Scenarios: 'Best case...Worst case.'