Rescue Mission Planners Gifts

"If you find him, tug on the rope, and we'll pull you both out."

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

"The note in the bottle said someone's stranded here, but where is he?"

Happy Hour

Bingo's Time Out - Part Three

'Arf! Arf!'

Nesting dolls stranded on an island send out nesting bottles with messages in each of them.

Heroic Rescue from a Falling Tower

Bingo's Time Out - Part Eight

"I said, 'I'm not on duty! I just came back to get my flip-flops.'"

'Not likely - the last time I went in one of those, it sank!'

"Okay, haha, very funny, you guys. Now toss down the ladder."

St Bernard delivering teddy to avalanche victim

What's your contingency plan, Randy? My what? If a calamity of biblical proportions were to strike here in Canardville, would you flee across the bridge to Candorville? Or would you search in vain for a fallout-resistant bunker, before surrendering to the cruel inevitability of your demise? I ask just for the sake of discussion. No reason to panic. Totally unrelated: I just found out someone who's definitely not me is selling fallout bunkers at buy-this-now-if-you-want-to-live.com. Very bad man.

"First save Mister chomp-chomp!"

Runs-With-Scissors Boy - Part One

Catastrophe Risk Insurance

The princess and the key

Tsunami Evac Route

"Sorry, boss. . . Google also doesn't know where your missing person is. I have no idea where to look now. . ."

'To prepare for Y2K, I backed up all discs and documents. . . stockpiled water and non-perishables. . . converted my investments to cash and set up a wood burning stove.'

'Ah, 'man's best friend' and it's brought by a dog.'

'Our policy is quite plain. We don't pay out on claims we can't pronounce.'

"Do I look like I need rescuing?"

'No fax paper? Ok, you'll have to ride for help.'

"Throw the rope!! It's a quicksandwich!!"

"This is a very nice thing you’re doing."

"Fire department? Yes, this is a cat and, well, big surprise here, I'm stuck in a tree... But here's the odd part—I am staring at no less than five other cats, all stuck in this same tree. So weird, huh?"

Rain Forest Filmcrew

A recurring crisis at the Farkinski farm

' I can't drink that..I'm a recovering alcoholic ! '

Man on desert island with a sail attached to two coconut trees.

"When you adopt a dog from a rescue centre you never know what bad habits they might have."

"I said, you have to be active in your own rescue!"

"If Timmy Had a Wiener Dog"