Mission Matcher Gifts

"What are we doing wrong?"

'That's our mission statement.'

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

"And there was I thinking you'd been Beta tested."

Preparing for casual dress friday at the investment bank.

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

'I was attracted to you but your online photo, but now that I've seen you in High-Def...'

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

'I hate the moods yuo wake up in!'

'Sir, you wanted an affectionate date capable of long term friendship...you said nothing about being allergic to fleas.'

'Norbert, he's playing our ring tone.'

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

'It's a bloody-cross-breed.'

'You and Phil make a great couple. You're perfect for each other!'

"I don' want another weather forcaster - they're too unpredictable."

'If this is 'Office Team Day' why are we wearing different colours?'

Acme Dating Service

At the Goldilocks Music Store albums are labeled: 'Too Many Notes,' 'Too Few Notes,' 'Too loud,' 'Too Soft,' and 'Just Right.'

"It's over between us, Kevin, I've met a most wonderful cod!"

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

'Top is right! He's a scaffolder working on a tower block'

Match maker

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

Sidekick speed matching service.

"Nothing works with this guy. Would you like us to shoot the pool guy?"

"Ironically, I think I'm experiencing job burn out!"

Body language interpreters - "He likes you and wishes to dance with you." "That's a get lost."

Fred noticed the mission trip list was different from when he was a youth.

HR worker wading through CV's.

"Your Father's just in a bad mood."

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

"The preacher's wife needs a new hobby."