Miscommunication Maven Gifts

"That's not what I said."

"Mr. Nwachuku?", "Extra dressing on the side?"

Vegan Burgers. We're expanding output, but you created confusion by telling customers that we're "beefing up" production.

'I'm studying how other geniuses handled creative blocks.'

"She bathes him. She feeds him. She burps him. Mother's a real micromanager."

"Assisting me with this delicate procedure is Dr. Warren. He's one of the top specialists in avoiding malpractice suits."

"Why not pay someone to clean out the gutters?" "Total waste of good beer money." And just like that, Gail became a widow.

"Bob put a chair with wheels on the table and climbed up to change a light bulb. Then the chair rolled away, Bob fell and... well, I guess we need a new industrial safety specialist."

"Here's another fine mess you've gotten us into."

'No! That's not a wall safe, it's a porthole!'

"Ding dong means the witch is dead. Ding ding means dinner is ready."

"Ms. Sweeney, take a letter, a memo, an email, a tweet, a text, never mind...I forgot what I was going to say."

'Let's begin our meeting. Everybody talk, nobody listen.'

"Elective surgery? But I'm not even registered to vote!"

Carrier Pigeons

"It's the first responders wondering when you'll be needing their services this weekend..."

You're Employment has been terminated -Smiley face lol

Next Year's Postal Service Marketing Campaign.

"If it makes you feel any better, I'm pretty sure you're single-handedly keeping the U.S. postal service in business."

Workplace 17 Days Without An Accident

'I'm afraid you've got the wrong department.'

"No, what I said was we need more stakeholders."

"No...I said aperitif!!"

Sea kelp? I said "seek help"!

"There's a man at the door with a wooden leg."

"Oops, this meeting is for Data Cloud Services? I thought it was Dodo the Clown Services!"

"If they just added texting to how they calculate GDP, this economy would be growing by 20%."

Lady to other: 'Not the screen, silly - you put the white-out on the CD!'

You were right -- She's not trying to high-five us!

People wait in line at the post office; a poster on the wall advertises "New! You face on a stamp! $50".

"Size 16? Sorry, I thought you said 61."

Production line producing production line workers.

'What a silly misunderstanding - you meant I should be home by ten-thirty P.M.?'

'I had a friend who was in an accident almost exactly like yours & he got a $1,000,000 settlement. Well, it was almost like yours. He didn't break a leg. He lost an arm. And he didn't trip over a cat. He was hit by a runaway train. And he didn't lose a

Naive to its unconventional approach, Wyatt is victimized by the rare and elusive Mumble Bee.