Miracle Enthusiast Gifts

'Give me a break - I've never done this before.'

'I have something to tell you, Moses...'

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

Jesus: the childhood years.

Keep Off The Grass and Keep Off the Water Too

Peter pranks the other Apostles...

Moses waters his daisies...

'You can't win -- I turned the water into wine, and then everybody wanted free refills!'

"Lazarus was a whole different deal. This engine is just dead, dead, dead."

Moses' First and Last Day as a Lifeguard...

"Congratulations! It's a messiah!"

"Asparagus, insurance detective. You died and we paid your life insurance and suddenly you rise from the dead?! That's what I'd call insurance fraud, Mr Jesus!"

Push button for sea to part.

"I realize it was a miracle, but you still need to pay taxes on the fair market value for all the wine created out of water."

Jesus walks on water just as Moses parts the sea.

"I'm sure you hear this all the time, but I have a great idea for an Act of God."

"I TOLD you they have hard water around here."

"What's the trick?"

Young Jesus learning to walk on water with waterwings around his ankles.

'No, he DOESN'T do penis enlargements!'

"That's Mary of Nazareth... She thinks her son walks on water!"

Elisha floats the keys to the borrowed car, after the disciple dropped them in the water.

"Well I can ask, but I'm pretty sure he doesn't do house calls."

"Sure we follow you because you're the Messiah, but it doesn't hurt that you conjure up a kick-ass Galilee merlot."

'James, Simon, wake up... ...the Master is sleep-healing again.'

'This stuff is all well and good son, but when are you going to get a proper job?'

"I don't care who your Dad is, you're spooking the fish"

'That lumbago you just got rid of - you gave to me!'

'You'll love these, sir - you'll think you're walking on water!'

'I turned water into wine. It's a mixed blessing.'

No one knows why Jesus stopped going to frat parties: 'What are we going to do with all this water?'

Jesus falling over a wave.

Jesus water skiing!

'Here we go again...'

Angel rambler walks on water.