Miracle Appreciator Gifts

"... And the cold foam cascara nitro goes to Lazarus!"

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

Tiny Visions

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

"Seriously, I used to be the staff of a guy named Moses, man the stories I could tell..."

"It turns out you can 'take it with you' if you pack correctly."

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

Cow Kong

'This stuff is all well and good son, but when are you going to get a proper job?'

"That's my boy!"

'I don't get it, I've only served that guy water all evening.'

"Dig deep! C'mon! You got this!"

"Are you sure you sent out those invitations?"

'Waiter, there's a mysterious stain on this napkin.'

'You can't win -- I turned the water into wine, and then everybody wanted free refills!'

'Water into wine is certainly impressive. D'you do water into petrol?'

'...if you look at it in the right way it begins to make sense.'

Jesus falling over a wave.

"Which button on the phone did you press?"

Moses Parting the Red Tea

"The magic's still there, but the sex is terrible."

'You can be replaced by Harry Potter, you know!'

Today's presentation - God's Miracles.

Christian Books: We have The Loaves and the Fishes. . . Joe's Deli: We have the Jam & the Tartar Sauce.

Life is just four letters...

"Who says nothing good is made in America anymore?"

'That lumbago you just got rid of - you gave to me!'