Modern Miracle Lover Gifts

'You'll find loaves in the pantry and fishes in the freezer.'

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

A fairy with wand and crown in pink tutu

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

"My great-great-grandfather was forced to flee Europe because of religious persecution."

Tiny Visions

Primitive magician

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

"Harry Potter and the People Who Care Way Too Much About Harry Potter"

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

"Did you remove the bay leaf?"

Moses as a child.

"Seriously, I used to be the staff of a guy named Moses, man the stories I could tell..."

"Its been on the market for over two years. The estate agent reckons it's something to do with negative edibility!"

"The Internet startup had only enough cash for one more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for eight days, until more venture capital could be raised."

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

Cut out and keep your own Fairy Godmother.

"You'll build another bug collection in no time."

"Well, I'm sorry. The 3 wishes I'm granting can't exceed the annual exclusion of $14,000."

"At least she's reading."

'I don't get it, I've only served that guy water all evening.'

'You're thinking of your wife again, aren't you?'

Moses gets REALLY lost in the desert.

'This stuff is all well and good son, but when are you going to get a proper job?'

"No guarantees, right?"

"That's my boy!"

'Please enter your pin now.'

"And for my next trick, an evidence-based strategy!"

'Pick a business card.'

Magician Playing Golf.