Miracle Aficionado Pillows

"I want to take a vacation, but the last time I left you in charge your face appeared on a grilled cheese sandwich."

'Lord, we worship the water you walk on.'

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

'One eye of newt or two?'

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

"Honey! Where are my lucky Incredible Hulk board meeting socks?!?"

Desert Island BBQ

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

"What the hell took so long?"

"Oh, sorry - Open Sesame, PLEASE."

Tiny Visions

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

What Harper Lee's REALLY been up to all these years

Spiro & Pusho illusionists

A Witch Consults Her Magic Mirror

"Seriously, I used to be the staff of a guy named Moses, man the stories I could tell..."

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

"In closing, I would like to remind the jury that he says he didn't do it."

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

"No one summons me anymore. They all have oil."

'It's an experiment to stop time.'

'The good stuff is here, under the counter.'

Jack in the Box

"Is it 'Measure once, cut twice?' Or 'Cut once, then measure?' Or maybe it's..."

ESP pizza: You'll get it before you order it or it's free!

'I don't get it, I've only served that guy water all evening.'

Bookshop - Occult and the supernatural.

'This stuff is all well and good son, but when are you going to get a proper job?'

"Then one day I thought, what the hell?! Maybe it's time I started granting a few of my own wishes."

"That's my boy!"

Houdini.

Houdini's Dog

'Your resume looks good. Let me hear some of your incantations.'