Miracle Enthusiasts Pillows

Pool Rules: No Diving, No Splashing, No Walking on Water.

"Nice one Solly, but it's a word of mouth campaign"

'Water into wine is certainly impressive. D'you do water into petrol?'

'A true televangelistic miracle'

Jerusalem's Got Talent

'Hey! I hope you got clean feet - we have to swim in this.'

'Hey Moses - that's cheating!'

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

Jesus was banned from all future fishing tournaments

"As you won't be needing it any more, can I have your disability parking permit?"

Toadstools

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

Late BroomStick

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

Rocking Witches.

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

Tiny Visions

"It's probably just seasonal."

"Seriously, I used to be the staff of a guy named Moses, man the stories I could tell..."

"The Internet startup had only enough cash for one more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for eight days, until more venture capital could be raised."

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

'No worries Grizella, let me call my 'eye of newt' guy...'

A likely story - lost his waterskis in a poker game !

'It's been murder since it was announced that eyes of newt might be a cancer cure.'

Remember, honey, abracadabra doesn't work anymore. Now it's command, option, shift.

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

"Wait a minute, is that toad I taste? I told you I've gone vegan, Cynthia!"

When her hex on ageing failed, Grizelda opted for the mobility - broom.

'I don't get it, I've only served that guy water all evening.'

"That's my boy!"

Improve your leaping ability or your money back.

'This stuff is all well and good son, but when are you going to get a proper job?'

A Magician pulls a rabbit out of his hat while behind him a clown pulls a carrot out of his.

"Eye of newt, not eye of tiger."

'Waiter, there's a mysterious stain on this napkin.'