Mining Humorist Gifts

"It looks like it's an eye bank."

'It's an extinction notice.'

'Missed again, eh, Bob? Maybe you should switch to decaf!'

'Yes, the treestand's maximum weight capacity is 300 pounds, you weigh 301 pounds.'

Inflatable Duck Boat

'We never had all these labour-saving devices in my young day!'

"Come on, Og, get with it. Everybody's putting their stuff on 'the cloud' these days."

'You got twenty years for hunting without a license? Kind of stiff, isn't it?'

Stock Market Research and Analysis

"That's why safety boots are so important. . . you see? Eddie's feet have stayed perfectly dry."

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

Garg saw the future, but didn't quite know what to do with it.

'Can I see your license,please?'

This is where Brent council sends you

We love the Rolling Stones...

"My client alleges attempted hit, run and bbq."

"One man's garbage is another man's best friend's treasure..."

Is this your father, little guy? No, lady, my father is a libel attorney, and you'll be hearing from him.

"You have a lot of unresolved anger and it's settled in your hat."

'Kitchen's small, but I love the granite countertops.'

Trap set by bear to catch hunter.

'Of course, I'm proud of you but I don't think he would be a healthy after school snack.'

'Pass the ball, Kevin Don't try to dribble your way out of trouble'

Reindeer hiding from hunter

'It's called a digital watch.'

"I'm doing my part to conserve electricity."

Global Warming.

Breaking down cardboard

J. J. Abrams

'They can't help smelling like that -- they're biodegradable.'

Dollar sign balloon.

'It's hunting season again. Got anything that smells like fresh venison?'

120 yards...cross-breeze...over water. Hand me a 20 gauge.

'Some buck lure this is. I drank three bottles and haven't seen one buck.'

"What do I do when I get to the top?"