Mini Executive Gifts

"Wow, this is neat, dad. Can I yell at some of your underlings?"

That kid's all business.

'Dad, can I go over to Kevin's house and play in his cubicle?'

'If you don't learn how to sign your name, you'll have to pay cash!'

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

'What a drive! Our boy's going to go a long, long way.'

'Call for you on the cream corn line.'

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

Where your mind & battle are los

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

Businesswoman Empowerment

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

Occu-Pie Mars

"My email is down... talk to me."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

"This position has become very important to the company."

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

'The check is in the email attachment.'

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

I'm looking for employees who have their own unique way of seeing things my way.

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'