Junior Executives Gifts

"So, when you young execs talk about 'phoning it in' there's no actual phone involved?"

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

Occu-Pie Mars

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

"Worst case of month-end burnout I ever saw."

"He likes it."

'Call for you on the cream corn line.'

Apart from your mother, who else thinks you're doing a good job as Chairman of the company?

Build Your Own Portfolio

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

'We're here to carbon date your company's carbon footprint.'

'What a drive! Our boy's going to go a long, long way.'

'You think I'm crazy; I think you're crazy...finally some common ground!'

"I hate performance review season."

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

Yomp Foundation Presentation committee: 'Don't let the gong intimidate you!'

'I know about the birds and the bees. Tell me about the bears and the bulls.'

"Here, we do not procrastinate, we 'table' things."

"The meeting will last until lunch, or hell freezes over, whichever is longer."

'I went to my boss and demanded the fruits of my labor. He gave me a Blackberry.'

"Oh dear...I don't think negotiations are going too well..."

My brilliant career

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

"Where we lack in productivity is made up by extremely low employee turnover."

'Let's hope the new norm means that less really is more.'

"C'mon people! All for me and me for me!"

"Today we are going to find out if you can that leap."

Internet.

"May I skip the usual Show & Tell and try to hustle some merch?"

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

'I'm not worried about losing my job. I'm worried about keeping it.'

"A few years ago, you management gurus told us to downsize until the halls echoed..."