Mind-meld Masters T-Shirts

We've been together so long, we can finish each other's texts.

"What do you want to talk about first...the kleptomania or the hoarding?"

"Try thinking about something else."

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

"Remember, the road to recovery begins with baby steps."

I have to get the Positive Thinker...

"I advised a patient to take responsibilty for his own actions, and now he is suing me!"

"You think you have problems? My entire wing command was just destroyed."

Man and brain

He tried to be positive, no matter the atmosphere.

A gorilla at a cocktail party thinking to himself "Fake it 'til make it".

You make me feel more like a veterinarian than a psychiatrist, Al. Why is that, Dr. Kapuchnik? Because you're one sick puppy.

'It's a sad case -- amnesia AND identity theft.'

'Would you feel less inferior if I made you a Colonel?'

"Don't worry they're all part of my team."

"We'll soon have you sorted out, Mr. Fenton."

Well, I feel a lot better - he says there's a method to my madness.

Yes, yes, let your aggressions out, but not here!

'I've lost the urge to repeat everything...'

"Well, how can I help cure your severe hypochondria if you keep cancelling appointments due to illness?"

Analyst and patient

Doctor with pump: 'Hold on a second while I inflate his ego.'

Trojan Chess

'I'm going to refer you to Dr. Keinsorge -- he actually enjoys this sort of thing.'

"I'm sorry, sir, but we're not MAGICIANS!"

Let's try some word disassociation

It's always the same dream. I'm in therapy, analyzing my recurring dream.

Hot air ballon, but with the ballon replaced by a thought bubble.

"As a last resort Tom's trying a mind-meld!"

'No more appointments today, Miss Mitchell. I'm all psyched out.'

When psychiatrists do self analysis.

'I'm trying to work on Mr. Findlay's self-esteem, Miss Oglethorpe — stop giggling in there!'

When psychiatry works too well!

"Therapist: Six couches no waiting"

How to get ahead and how to get further ahead.