Milking Master T-Shirts

"Be careful of this guy, he's all hands."

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

'Still not ready to talk? Ok dip him again.'

The Brothers Grime

"He's such a fussy eater."

Mother puts extra long dummy in babies mouth.

'Ok..Ok...I'm putting the lawnmower back in the shed!'

A Tit for Tat.

"They’re real."

Pull the udder one

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

'I can't get out! -- I lost the owner's manual!'

'Cracked nipple? But I didn't even drop you.'

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

Important Muscles.

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

TV Chef Cooking Range

'If you're happy to demand feed we'll get along just fine.'

'To find out how to start your new mobile, please read the manual. T' read the manual, please start your mobile.

'At milking time, I just love the soft hands of the new young farm hand: A nice change from old farmer John's...'

Timmy Works with His Pet Cow

'Turn everything off...we've sprung a leak!'

"This dinner party's going to a take a but of work."

"The instructions state that some anger, frustration and confusion is expected."

'Are you trying to tell me that neither of you get penalty rates for the 2 a.m feed?'

"How almond milk is made"

"I have a strong personal commitment to dinner."

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

'I think breast milk is better... It's free, always fresh and the cat can't get to it.'