Military Personnel Gifts

The Salute

'Och! Cut the red wire. What's the worst that can happen?'

"Is this legal?"

The Fort Knox Gold Depository has a key under the mat

'And then Dmitri noticed something that would have a profound effect on the human/robot wars.'

'No, the morning traffic doesn't bother me.'

"Well, I'm an optimist - I still think peace can be avoided."

'Before we begin, I'll read out the minutes from our last meeting...'

'It's a foolproof computer network, sir, that no one can break into, not even a kid.'

"This one's for not asking, and this one's for not telling."

"Sir, the platoon suffered heavy casualties from a roadside IUD."

Dove of Peace casting shadow of a fighter plane

"RAF Recruitment Waiting Room."

Corn Silo / Wheat Silo / Missile Silo

'I don't have my glasses on: What does it say?'

'This one is for serving 27 years in the military without anyone finding out I'm gay.'

A therapist hides behind sandbags as a general talks of war.

'...You push the wrong button, and now, instead of our fans enjoying a fireworks display, we've got an international incident on our hands.'

'Hey! These target coordinates are the same... as...'

"These maps are old, so pay no attention to the borders."

'Hi Mom, Boot camp is fine, but I think our drill sergeant is hard of hearing. Every time we say something, he yells 'I can't hear you.''

Water Wars.

'...Wait a moment, I need to review my exit strategy.'

'Remember to pace yourself!'

'So what did you die of?' Reply - 'Alcoholism...and you?' Reply - 'Nationalism.'

'When did 'At Ease' become 'Chill'?'

"This cloaking device avoids detection by the G.A.O."

"Oh, are you attacking from home today?"

Army Recruitment Centre - Defend the American Dream!

"Maybe you shouldn't send out e-mails when you're tired."

Small arms training

"Unfortunately, a tiny percentage of the drones are opposed to violence."

"Mind if I turn my hearing aid down?"

"I just feel safer in one of these."

Soldiers Freezing in the Crimean War