Military Giggles Pillows

'Ignore Malcolm...he farts like a trooper.'

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

Cat in a tank...

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

'At ease, soldier.'

A military officer sits at his desk with desk trays marked 'Search' and 'Destroy.'

Royal Bear Force - "Honey at 10 o'clock."

'Who said the Germans don't have a sense of humour? Just look at that card Hans Greber and we have haven't been shot at all day.'

"Did you call for a Medic?"

'Does my bum look big in this?'

French Army knife

"I'm just gonna reach in my back pocket real slow-like and turn off my ringer."

'...and this is the Mess.'

'At last! Some decent kit.'

'M.O.D. find budget replacement for the Fleet Air arm.'

Tank driver wielding a slingshot.

'Me? Morale Officer? --Why do you always pick on ME?'

Banting in the Yeomanry

At a Country House

Freeway exit signs: Regulation, Deregulation, Reregulation.

Ad Valorem

'Well done troops: Spring is over, we can have a break now...'

'It's been five years since leaving Iraq and I'm still getting the sand out my ears.'

If you ask me, pets shouldn't be allowed in the House of Commons...

Your Country Needs MOO!

"Sir, the platoon suffered heavy casualties from a roadside IUD."

'It's only a slug Norman.'

'THINGMY ON THE PORT BOW!! You know, what's it called? Long and pointy... Very fast... TORPEDO ON THE PORT BOW!!'

Peacekeeping?

The Bengal Lancers/Bingo Lancers/Bagel Lancers/Bungle Lancers

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'