Captain Giggles Pillows

Surgeon finds a doohickey on the patient's thingamabob.

"Yes I know, and you dropped sauce on your shirt."

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

A baby playing on a grand piano

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

A mum trying to dry an excited child

'Gee, Doc - couldn't you just use a rubber mallet to check my reflexes?'

The New Age Dentist.

'There's nothing in the rules about gloves.'

Sportknitting

At the baby oil factory.

"While registering online, little Ahab had confused fencing and flensing,"

Hockey Goal

"You've done it, Martin - you've taught him to smile!"

'Time out!... Scooper!!'

'I had a stomach ache, so I took bicarb of soda and went to bed early. Did I do the right thing?'

Stretcher Header.

'I guess I get a good deal. I give him the milk and he burps it over dad's shoulder.'

'Pick something you can tolerate from this list of side effects and I'll prescribe something appropriate.'

A pirate fishes using his hook.

"Health insurance? Waking up breathing each morning is my health insurance!"

"Lady!!! Could we turn down the A.C.?!"

A real turkey lunch.

"He should've passed the puck."

'Why didn't he stop the ball?'

'Now what?'

"Does your tooth still hurt?"

"Spinning, reefing, tacking...they sound like a dress making circle."

'That's why we're vice-presidents, and he's president.'

'Well one of us need to watch him, otherwise he's liable to take somebody's eye out!'

Goalie saves a boot instead of a football.

Milking small business.