Military Commander Gifts

Drone Court

Although less physically imposing than his famous uncle, Baron von Munchkinhausen was no less formidable.

P.O.W. !! to US credibility.

"Sire! -- Your army has been defeated!"

Support the Ex-Troops

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

Neo-International Law

Vehicles are having their own election. These are the candidates. The ambulance appeals to voters who think health care is most important. Voters focusing on education issues favor the school bus. And those wanting family-friendly policies are backing the minivan. The tractor is an expert on agricultural issues, and the import is a free trade advocate. Those voters concerned about environmental issues like the electric hybrid, and those wanting a strong military support the Jeep. What's t

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

Servicemen.

"Postwar is hell."

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

Military Medals

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

WW2 fighter pilot with emoji kills

'I was in a camouflage unit, so this one is for Hide and Seek.'

"Hey, dad. We wanna play army before we go to bed. Can we have our toy medals back?"

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

"We must rise up and claim our rightful place at the table of society! We must never rest until we are given the respect and dignity we deserve! Chica power!"

'This one is for serving 27 years in the military without anyone finding out I'm gay.'

Crony Capitalism (Always Follow the Money Trail)

Monuments

"The first one is for graduating from basic training. The rest are classified."

'You can come down a peg. Mesopotamia gave the world bureaucracy, you know.'

"How come you always take Amnesty International's side?"

'I got this one for thinking outside the box.'

Trump

"This just in... the country has adopted a 24 hr military clock... ...details at 23."

"Weather like this plagued my retreat from Moscow."

'There's too much corruption in the third world.'

'I was in the catering corps.'

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

'This one is for keeping 'On Message' in the spin wars.'

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

Infantry.