Milestone Markers Gifts

"I'm not actually 40 this year but that's the birthday I celebrate every year."

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

'This is the only part of my old Army uniform that still fits.'

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"One year closer to college!"

"The answer to bone loss is to bury them deeper.'

Pilot with champagne.

'I'm just not as ambidextrous as I used to be.'

Gary turns 40.

"Your brow is definitely more furrowed than it used to be!"

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

Pearly King and Queen

'Congratulations, you graduated.'

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

An old man exercising with hourglasses

Babies first words are 'Take me to your leader'

Do you think I'm sixty?

"Careful."

His first conspiracy theory...'Is it a coincidence the first time I walk, they start locking all the cupboards? I think not!'

The fate that awaits us all: creeping Rooneyism

Old Wine in an Old Bottle

'Gentlemen, a toast to our 4th fishing trip this year. Perhaps, one day, we'll remember to bring poles, in addition to beer.'

"Your mother and I want to make your 21st birthday a moving experience. We'll help you pack."

You know you're getting up there in years when your birthday cake requires that extra box of candles....

"As it's your birthday, would you like to go in the Big Chair?"

'I'm fighting ageing.'

"I've outlived my conventional and alternative doctors."

Aging Problems

Attic of hopes and dreams...

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

"It seemed a given that my bucket-list should include an actual bucket."