Midlife Reflections Gifts

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

'Someone told him life begins at forty. Now he's reserving his energies!'

"I can't go to our high school reunion, no one will recognize me...Hell, I don't recognize me!"

"Remember the days we could drink and party all night and we thought guys in their 50's were old geezers?"

How's your midlife crisis going, Al? That turned out to be a false alarm, doctor. Today after a heavy lunch I realized it's just a midriff crisis.

"To be honest, a couple of years ago I picked an age and have stuck to it ever since."

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

ZZZZZZZ Top

'See? You call my look 'a midlife crisis' but for these guys it's a major TV series.'

Corporate departments as a metaphor for growing up.

"This car is very fast and very expensive. Just how bad is your midlife crisis?"

The summer of her 39th year, Eleanor could be found most evenings on a hill (known locally as Robert's Hump) doing aerobics of her own devising.

We micro-grafted all the hairs from the back of your head to the top and now we've completely covered your bald spot.'

'Take a good look, Junior. When I was your age, I was 'Fun Size,' too.'

'I've used up all my eligibilities'

"You used to be that ambitious."

'Where Are They Now?'

"I'm 59 and they say I'm middle aged. Just how many people do you know who are 118?"

'Push'n 50, but ya still got it!!'

'Here's your chance to become a legend.'

'Let's face it George: we're not spring chickens anymore...'

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

"I've come to stage in my life-cycle where just landing on stuff isn't good enough anymore."

Getting older is...making noises whenever you bend down or get back up.

Midlife: You Are Here.

"Wasn't I lovely then eh, Tiddles?"

"Remember that, honey? Serious testosterone."

'Is that all you can do Just sitting there watching your old movies'

This is what Fred gets for wishing for more hair.

"It seems like only yesterday I was on the verge of getting it all together."

Realizing that his youth was now behind him, Mr. Twigly left home at the sight of his first gray hare.

'Brother, the Lord takes a very dim view of the comb-over.'

Been there. Done that. (Man stands between two doors.)

Middle Age: When an 'All Nighter' means you didn't have to get up to pee!

"Remember back when we were just larva and didn't have a care in the world?"