Micro-organism Fan Gifts

'We are parasites, but I think we also have parasites.'

Hermit Crabapple Tree

Butterfly herders of the wild west.

"Chomp... Chomp... Curry Tree..."

'Simple - it's your high-protein diet that keeps you so manic.'

"This will sting a bit."

"Pssst! - Gerald, you've mutated again. . ."

'Make it a microbrew, Jake! I've gone organic!'

"Think about the honey."

The worm that churned!

'You tell me how to give them a fever, and I'll tell you how to make them cough.'

"Gotta go, lads, I smell death."

"Is it me, or would a dung beetle taste really good right now?"

Friendly bacteria

Asexual harassment.

Unwelcome guests can be caught and thrown out...there is no need to kill them.

"I feel so seen right now."

"If you order from our wellness menu, you get a side of yogurt with every dish."

Crabbing

'Standing on tiptoe waving your claw may attract a crab, but it certainly doesn't woo me.'

"Dear, will you sprint down to the store and get a box of wheat germ and a pint of yoghurt?"

"Wouldn't it be nice to slip into a simple little black number for a change?"

'Are these mushrooms edible?'

'I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...'

'Jack contracted botrytis cinerea. It hasn't done much for his looks, but his disposition's a lot sweeter.'

Caution!! Slippery When Wet.

A Bug's Life Advice

You might want to cut back on the probiotics.

Spider Exhibit. It says spiders can have hundreds of children at the same time. No wonder they climb the walls! (Published originally on July 23, 2002.)

'This underground facility allows us to be closely involved with proton decay, gravity waves, neutrinos and the growing and selling of mushrooms.'

Louis Pasteur Looks Back: "Of course I'm very pleased with pasteurized milk, but naming a wine or beer after me would have been a lot more charismatic."

Alright! Now I get to have two girlfriends.

There's a sky full of bloated women counting on you to produce a pro-biotic yoghurt like you've never produced before!

What next?!

Imitation Crab