Metrics Evaluators Gifts

Messing Up My Metrics

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

'We consult those with whom we agree, which is why I rarely consult my conscience.'

Annual Stockholders' Meeting: Take some tissues.

"Thank you, Mr. Mulvaney, but what we're really looking for is someone with talent."

"I like an attentive lover, but these feedback forms are ridiculous."

"Right. Women adore him, men want to be like him, and YOU... well, you're hopeless. So, am I the ONLY one who sees through this guy?"

"How would you rate your toleration for risk?"

Rodin's Irish Judge

"When you say you love your life, should I be happy for you?"

"I see that grading papers for the teacher is going to your head."

'This is the time when the University started to rank our research by the number of publications, not the quality of the publications...'

'We first met here - when I was doing your job.'

Sex Score

'You got the job, the family and now the fancy car. But it's not enough, is it? No, my friend, it's never enough.'

"Has it been in your family long?"

'You say here you're a people person.'

"I think it's an early version of facebook."

'Government performance targets reach unprecedented levels.'

"It all began with trying to measure project outcomes."

'And as a new client of our law firm, you get this nifty neck brace to wear in court.'

"It's our first anniversary, so I've written up your performance review...."

'Some mentor you turned you turned out to be.'

"Also, that random comment you made three years ago will count against you."

"I didn't go to college, but I took out and am defaulting on school loans to make it look like I did."

"Buying stuff online has rekindled Sean's literary ambitions. They're always asking for customer reviews."

'Your new boyfriend has potential, needs some omprovement. Overlooks a few things.' 'My husband is an estate agent.'

"He's still planning what to watch on TV tonight."

"Well, was the claim evidence-based?"

"Some people think it's as valid as testing our teachers."

'Felton,has it occured to you that you may have taken a talent for self-effacement a bit too far?'

'There's so much choice these days.'

'Simms might be overextending himself.'

'Stocks' losing people to 'Mutal and pension funds'