Evidence Evaluator Gifts

"Well, was the claim evidence-based?"

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

"You're either lying or not telling the truth."

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"

'We consult those with whom we agree, which is why I rarely consult my conscience.'

"I like an attentive lover, but these feedback forms are ridiculous."

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'I don't believe it - if this evidence is correct it'll rock the very foundations of our research grant application.'

"My next witness is his Google Assistant."

"And for my next trick, an evidence-based strategy!"

'Regarding our deadline - have we moved to long-range planning or still stuck in short-term excuses?'

"Miss Rogers, Sally Green. Is it true my son's research project is 'the effect of too much television on a typical ten-year-old?'"

Barrister asking a witness to produce burnt papers

Rodin's Irish Judge

'Exhibit A: the oxygen tube that came loose the night she died. You were there that night. You wanted to play then, too.'

Trust me, it's scarier than the skull and crossbones ever was!

"When you say you love your life, should I be happy for you?"

Documentation Please

'As it turned out, circumstantial evidence was all they needed.'

"My dog ate my parents' marijuana, and then ate my homework."

"An interesting selection, Dad, yet essentially a failure-as you can see, I'm still awake."

'Oh, no! They've got a Swiss-army defence lawyer!'

"Has it been in your family long?"

'And as a new client of our law firm, you get this nifty neck brace to wear in court.'

Theories and Proofs.

"Also, that random comment you made three years ago will count against you."

"I didn't go to college, but I took out and am defaulting on school loans to make it look like I did."

"I'm sorry but a fat, guzzling wife cannot be classed as a consumable."

"Buying stuff online has rekindled Sean's literary ambitions. They're always asking for customer reviews."

'I see that wearing underwear endorsed by Michael Jordan has done nothing for your jump shot.'

'You've left DNA samples all over the place!'

"Perhaps you're to blame for having unrealistic expectations."

"I have listened very carefully to all the evidence."