Metaphor Appreciator Gifts

Lonely fish.

'I'm thinking about quitting the rat race.'

"The seller isn't willing to come down."

Meat Grinder

A yin and yang sign with dripping paint

'The cat wants to come out.'

A 'Cling film': "Ivy - get a life!"

A tiny smoker pops out of a man's hat.

"Let's face it, Harry...you've got no backbone!"

Ship of fools.

'Gentlemen, the company is in bad shape...'

'He definitely has to get his ducks in a row.'

Reading my Critics

"Who's got the hammer?"

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

"We have an acronym!"

'This guy loves giving stump speeches. Ironically, they're all against deforestation.'

'The boss said I never made any profits and I never found customers worth mentioning and that's why he promoted me to the company's chief bad example!'

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"Steamed vegetables."

"We didn't want to know the gender in advance."

Don Quixote is Caged (Don Quixote).

'Oh Hi!'

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

'Oh don't listen to him! Norman wasn't a motivational guru... he was just that cat in those silly 'hang in there' posters.'

'This one is for serving 27 years in the military without anyone finding out I'm gay.'

"Amateurs."

Nails pinning down the hammer that usually strikes them.

The Greek Trampoline

Russia Money Laundering

"How long were you in the waiting room?"

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

"She's a show dog...purebred, of course." "That's great! My guy's a Sanskrit scholar...wrote for the Harvard Lampoon."

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.