Metamorphosis Maestro Gifts

"If I knew when this was going to end, it wouldn't be so stressful."

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

'Ms Simpson, I believe I've finally done it. I've written the Great American Memo.'

"I guess someone got up on the wrong side of the podium today."

'Uh - oh... this looks like an unfriendly takeover!'

Your Guide to Winning Movember

'A few messages came in during your lunch break.'

'What do you mean, the chart resembles an iceberg?'

"Anyway, we'd love to have You on board for the Creighton deal."

Okay, let's see...who's on tap to update our progress with that hostile takeover?

Computer Music

New Fads For The Handlebar Mustache

The merger hits a snag.

The central metaphor of her novel was a fly.

"...And please let the merger do through!"

Two men discussing thier moustaches

'It's worse than outsourcing. Instead of hiring foreign labor, they got bought out by foreign management.'

'It's another office memo from that Mr. Tolstoy.'

Lawrence of Suburbia

'Where are the kids?'

"Remember, negotiating is like buying fruit. You don't know what you'll get until you squeeze 'em a bit."

"Richard P. Ruggles—a man and his mantelpiece."

"Can you give me some sort of metaphor for how you're feeling?"

'Mess with me if you have to, son, but not with the regimental moustache!'

Nest building

"I think it's time we acknowledged the elephant in the room."

'Overwhelm the facts with interpretation and have it on my desk Thursday.'

'I will now play a selection of digital audio files I downloaded today.'

"And this was the day our Marketing and Public Relations people finally exhausted their supply of 'come-from-behind-and-win-it-all' sports metaphors!"

How to wear a false moustache.

'Then it's agreed. It doesn't have to rhyme.'

Fifty ways to style your nasal hair.

'It's not a stick-up, it's a merger offer.'