Merger Maestro Gifts

Just Merged.

'This is where we merged our 'creative' and 'accounting' departments.'

The merger hits a snag.

"Anyway, we'd love to have You on board for the Creighton deal."

Chinese business cuisine.

"Remember, negotiating is like buying fruit. You don't know what you'll get until you squeeze 'em a bit."

"...And please let the merger do through!"

'I didn't know he was also into corporate mergers!'

"It started with noodle soup, but with a merger here and a takeover there..."

Door to business for corporate consolidation attorneys with many names on it.

'We can't merge again. Our letterhead already takes up the entire page.'

'It's not a stick-up, it's a merger offer.'

'The negotiations would go quicker if you'd stop flicking lit matches at me.'

"I'd say Corporate Raiders."

'You're in great shape! You've got years of hostile take-overs ahead of you.'

"We must be approaching Tokyo.Those are top flight Japanese merger lawyers!"

'Uh - oh... this looks like an unfriendly takeover!'

'They're mine from a previous merger.'

Okay, let's see...who's on tap to update our progress with that hostile takeover?

Businessman in a tattoo parlour.

Armstrong Maynard, proprietor of our humble cafe, is swept up in merger frenzy. Armstrong says we're taking over the little guy. We are the little guy. There are littler. Even he wouldn't ... I'm taking you out. I don't wanna be acquired. Lemonade 50¢

PGA Tour merges with Liv Golf

Mozart on a computer,

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

"I guess someone got up on the wrong side of the podium today."

"That's Hicks from the corporate office. He's adorable, but trust me—when it comes to acquisitions, he's an animal!"

Fish and color

"Oh, no! We've inadvertently gobbled up our own parent company."

"If I knew when this was going to end, it wouldn't be so stressful."

Woman at a desk with in out boxes marked Market Up Market Down.

"This is bad work, Edwards! Bad! Bad! Bad! Bad!"

"Do you swear to calm the jittery financial markets, all the jittery financial markets and nothing but the jittery financial markets, so help you God?"

...I wonder who started the rumour of your resignation?

Cheer up, you'll get your day.

A statue of a businessman in a park with an inscription that reads "Outperformed the market".