Metalhead With A Twist Pillows

Ozzy Osbourne bites the head off a chocolate bunny at his easter concert.

Eddy looked worriedly out of the window. If his heavy metal friends saw him, his credibility would be lost for ever."

Motorherd

"I put the speed on reckless. . ."

"Apparently the Ebola virus can make your ears bleed."

"Would the owner of the 1985 Ford station wagon, license plate METAL-1, please move your car so that the ice-cream truck can get through?"

"I'm just gonna do one more set."

'Forget whale song, I'm giving them some death metal.'

Now play some Metallica!

Santa Metal Claus

Fuzz - there's a rumor about the band that we only play Metallica covers...

'What do you mean - you want a white wedding?'

"Well, at least I'm embracing my feminine side!"

'We realise that your speciality is heavy metal...'

Heavy Metal Scrap Merchants.

Musical Mestizo.

I blame society for putting me here. But mostly I blame metallurgy for keeping me here.

'You need a new bobbin.'

'Air guitar 101.'

And then, right in the middle of a Warrant/Winger double bill, Rob Myers becomes the first person in history to actually have his socks rocked off.

The Barbarian At the Villiage Gate

'Darling, it's the local Satanists wondering whether they can sing us some black metal.'

Don't forget to switch off your cellphones.

Heavy Metal Scrap Merchants.

Future Opera

'...Here's another heavy metal wake up call for you!'

One night, Albert got haunted by a Heavy Metal demon.

'And this is our research staff: Brad covers autos, Cathie covers Big Pharma, and Keith knows heavy metals.'

"...Even Death himself went through a 'Glam Reaper' phase."

"I thought it was just a phase, but now that he's in his 40s I'm not so sure!"

No, I'm afraid I don't know any songs in the death metal genre.

"Funny, I never did it for the money. I just always wanted to make T-flanges."

'How can you possibly buy a sandwich where they sell motor oil?'

'Just which heavy metal did you say Edwards is researching?'

"Noise? Noise?!! That was Bullet for my Valentine!"