Metal Humorist Gifts

Commodities Exchange. Metals. Tin Items or Less.

"Canadian Mt. ‘Rush’more"

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

Bad Timbre: the world's first Garage Philharmonic Orchestra

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

Barcode on Ancient Greek Vase

"The Eggsorcist"

"This next one is my own quirky rendition of Berlioz's 'Symphonie Fantastique,' Movement 5, 'Dream of a Witches' Sabbath.'"

"I was going to play the Moonlight Sonata, but I forgot the key."

Radiator jazz player

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

"Not now, my love. I'm feeling preminstrel."

'Does this thing get channel four.'

Electric Blanket.

Elevator Music

"I thought it would be appropriate to have a band playing as we went down."

"[UNABLE TO PROCESS THIS IMAGE]"

'...And, from what I understand, they don't have any hard drive at all.'

The Phantom Of The Garden

"They'll be expecting adagio. Go with the allegro."

Guitar pickin'

Opera singer singing to her partner who is wearing a gas mask on due to her bad breath.

The mysterious ancient stone figures of Keister Island.

Pay me not to pay 'Wonderwall'

Rap-scallions

Waiter in resturant sawing violin.

"Who is 'coming around the mountain,' John? Could it be your mother?"

'PHWOAR! You should have seen her rear end when she sat on the piano. . . played 'TINK' and 'BOOM' at the same time!'

"Being with you is just getting too surreal for me, Larry."

Double Saxophone

"Beans, Them Beans, Them Beans, Beans, Beans..."

Edward Elgar.

'Never mind singing it in rap...a simple 'I do' will suffice.''

Dr. Phil takes it home.

"Ding" "Dong"