Metafiction Enthusiast Gifts

'We've traced you back to the cartoonist who drew you.'

I should be a writer when I grow up...

I figured out how we can pay for the kids' college tuitions. Do tell. I'm going to leave for a year of self-discovery, which I will chronicle in a best-selling memoir. Oh, but

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

Display of political memoirs books categorized as: 'Non-fiction,' 'Fiction,' and 'Pure Fantasy'.

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

"Mark, you have to stop calling John's gospel 'Fan Fiction.'"

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

"Yes, could you discuss the inspiration for the protagonist? Specifically, the motivations which propel the direction of his narrative?" "I would prefer not to." "Bartleby, the author."

'He tells me there's one chapter of his memoir titled, 'My Likeable Master'.'

"That's just the end of the panel, girl."

The Quack Quack Diaries: The George Broderick Diaries

"It's a blood curdling novel about the brutal murder of a publisher who rejected a book about the brutal murder of a publisher..."

'You understand, of course, that my memoirs must be written in ELITE type.'

'I've read your manuscript-it's a miracle you survived all the booze, sex, and drugs while on your world tour, but are you sure you want it published during an election year senator?'

"I loved your embarrassing personal essay in the 'Times.' "

'That's right...his appendix...and it's pure dynamite! Don't you see? It'll be the ultimate insider celebrity memoir!'

"OMG! A portal to another panel."

Eva Schloss

Woman at bookshop counter says: 'The Political Memoirs Wing is through there.'

My memoirs - 'I've character assassinated the target.'

Vanity Publishing.

Escaping a desert island

Misery Memoirs Bumper Pack.

"Oh, it's not a baby book, it's his memoirs."

'The toughest things to deal with are a new, charismatic opponent and a former colleague's memoirs.'

'I see dumb people wearing 'I see dumb people' shirts.'

"Why don’t you just go back to writing your memoirs and forget about the whole graphic-novel thing?"

"Health officials now confirm the proliferation of a new epidemic they're calling 'way too many memoirs being published.'"

"And yet, I too am a still life."

"Sorry, but your personal life story just isn't very original."

The national cartoonists' speech-bubble strike enters its 2nd week...

'According to this list, this list is ranked #4 on the greatest lists of all time.'

'How could a man who seduced a hundred and thirty-two women find the time to write a twelve-volume memoir?'

"So- how go the formative years?"