Mentalist T-Shirts

The ordinary Kreskin

A person is reading another person's thoughts.

Post-Hypnotic Suggestion

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

“Who’s a good boy that doesn’t feel obliged to prove it by holding too many interesting literary and social opinions?”

"And so another trip comes to an end...with family brought closer together by a shared experience."

Hypnotoon

“What if I tell you the card you are thinking of is … the Jack of Hearts ?”

"I'd let you in, but I'm not sure I'm all here today"

''Time is an illusion'? - How long did it take you to come up with that?'

'I think that's enough brain defragging for today.'

'If only I could accept that I can't accept being someone who finds it hard to accept acceptance from those who accept me for the person that I can't accept I really am.'

"Turns out the love of money wasn't the root of all evil."

The Seven Deadly Sins: Envy, envy, envy, envy, envy, envy and envy.

"I was in corporate sales for years but then I realized, I'm a gatherer not a hunter."

'I would be more health conscious if only I could also be unconscious.'

"I've never quite figured out how it works. For years, you're on the right side of history, and then one day, you're not!"

Recycle your problems. Many of our neuroses, hang-ups and character defects can be re-used by others.

'It might be all right for some but I'll not have anyone tinkering with my subconscious. Anyway, supposing they found I hadn't got one!'

"I misplace everything, yet there always seems to be more of it."

'What is it, Harold. You seem to be distracted.'

'I hit my mental peak in homeroom.'

Telepath for Ms Thompson...

"This is WYOU the station that broadcasts your thoughts live all day long..."

"That's my new mantra. . . 'woulda coulda shoulda'?"

"Long time no see! How are you doing?"

"Today I'm going to be unaware, uninvolved, uncommitted, and self-centered."

"When you lie about yourself, is it to appear closer to or farther away from the middle of the bell curve?"

'No matter what I try, it seems that I just keep coming back to the same place in my life.'

'Please note, I'm here in name only. My mind is physically located elsewhere.'

"Reality is a great place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live there."

'I try to get through to her but all she wants to do is blend bloody spoons all day.'

'Steve is our top salesperson. His secret is spending time visualizing success before he comes to work.'

"So when did you realise you'd gone mad?"

Euthanasia - UK patients go to Switzerland